Some of the things that make me happy.

Sleeping Babies

Shopping

Close Hugs

Chocolate

Chillin by the lake

Signed, MissMeeka

A relationship

I'm not quiet sure what you do.
But somehow when i walk away from you
i feel like i have nothing to look forward to
You care for other people you sympathize them
But with me you are so hard and cold
like what I feel is not really there at all..
You wonder why i tell you i'm leaving
You obviously dont believe me
To you whatever i do isnt right
Even though i try so hard to prove you wrong
I always want to break down and be like the rest
but then that would be proving you right
My heart aches from the verbal abuse
My soul crys for days
Though you think you've been forgiven
When I'm happy and enjoy myself
You tell me i'm concieted and witchlike
I tell you things like i dont cry for you
because really i'm crying because of you
I'm selfish, mean,homely,careless and rude
You tell me my actions are reflection of myself
you tell me i have no reason to be unhappy
with all this you still say I love you too.

Somethings Can be overlooked

There they were sitting under tree. The moon light shining on the lake the stars high above them. Talking and laughing with the voices of their ancestors the foot steps of there brothers and sisters behind them. She thought What can be more perfect The first time they actually had a conversation. They sat together worried if anyone would come up to them and ruin what was going. Without realizing they really had nothing to talk about yes there was the attraction yes there was the longing that haven't been fulfilled.

They had that not knowing what the two would ever be together. she thought and thought of days like this here it was what she wanted and it was passing her by not paying attention to his handsome looks and he's speech.

Removing her natural way of thinking she was stunned star struck for he was a star to her unknowing of what he was really like what he really had in store for her. The two never really had perfect timing you think this would be a perfecting ending story for she had wrote so many endings to the romance. Had she blinded herself? Forgetting her standards but for what standard had she had? Her last relationship was with a boy who she had not really liked but only for the fact she didn't want to hurt him.

This ex of hers Took many things from her that she hadn't wanted lost. Had she been called down so many times to have not seen what true beauty she really had? She was not perfectly set for what this perfect moment could have been.This girl was never told how beautiful and nice and giving she was. She had not known anything? How could she for god sakes she was raised by slobs.This girl spends her days in her mind thinking and wishing and wondering about how things Could be. What could be is what keeps her alive. This man that she had so sweetly fallen for hadn't the heart that she needed.

He did not wont her and for why? Because he only wanted something that she could keep that she kept That separates her from the others which makes this girl "pure" He can not have this girl. She is too good for him. This girl is considered pure untouched by man. But yet she feels she has nothing. She longs to be in love she longs for these moments to last for they don't happen often. What could be of this girl? What fortune can she have? Is she worth your time. IS she worth your tears? A girl who would treat you the way you should be how every man should be treated instead of these wenches. why hasn't anyone fallen for her? She is not rude she isn't ugly she is not spoiled? What is wrong with this girl..

Why hadn't this boy taken her love. This man left her for what? For why? What have she done to deserve to be treated like nothing. He spends his days on his pass. She baffled at the fact that now she's being told shes good and wonders why doesn't he want her? Why does he tell her longs for others? This girl is everything you need. Why hadn't he given her the time to show herself to him? Why didn't he fight for her? Why hadn't he try..

SometimesThisWorldDoesntMakeSense

But that's something that we all new? correct?

Poems from My Past-

So the title basically explains it here's some of my poems from the past :)


-Without beholding.

Lately I've Spent Too much time thinking about what could beOnly wishing you would seeDressing for you, knowing that you'll never care..It kills me and it's hard to bareCould you take the moment to look in my eyesAnd tell me what I feel is all lies

-The Unspoken Words

Here's for the words said unspoken. So i write this letter backwards to say I love you first.
I'm so sorry your close to broken. Cause my life is about to burst.
Your my light that's there to give me hope. Please understand because this is no joke.
I'm stuck and I need you to help me cope. I barely know you but. I've knowen you my whole life. And maybe one day my spouse. But that might be going to far. With out you I feel like heading to the bar. Life with you is just so much better. But Now I feel it's time to end this Letter.

-I love that.

You know when your walking... and you get that light smelll of flowers but dont see them..You know when you check your mail .. and find an unexpected checkYou know when your sad.. and your driving your favourite song comes on..You know when you want to do something fun... and someone calls and asks you out!!You know that secrect.. feeling of accomplishment when you clean your room..or when you turn your head and relize that mother earth is sooo beatifulyou know how somedays you feel great and you pick up a piece of garbage when some one you know can finsh your sentences and is rightwhen your hair is doing what you want it too..when that guy you secretly crush on says something nice to you..when your with a friend and you guys laugh so hard at nothing..well... I love that..

- Recent actually right now

A broken heart has been healed
The deal between me and you is perfectly sealed
I walk my paths with a smile
Because i know that I have walked the mile
I past those stepping stones
This Gives me a joy further beyond my bones
Yes I remember and always will
My life is still so young
Have yet to feel the true meaning of life
I will not turn my head to my past
Because The pain has no reason to last

Thoughts of my Mind?

I Sit here in this room full of nothing. Pondering and smiling about the past.I miss my past. If I could go back to one day it'd be september 29, 2007.Sometimes I wish I could go back and Start all over.But then I think I would have just repeated everything that's already happen. I couldnt go through all that again.My past is my past. I should be worried and Planning and changing my future. I Feel as if at my age I am love driven? But tell me what teenage girl isnt? at least I have head on my shoulders unlike half the teenage girl population.I'm a hopeless romantic. And really all i want is someone there.Just to be there.... just for me. Someone to care.. and want to know

about me? that's all I want. Seems impossible to find here. where i live. I mean i dont have very many friends and well i'm not the greatest looking haha but i mean i think i have a good personility? maybe not great but good? haha oh it doesnt matter.

P.s sorry i havent written in awhile and the unexplainable last post was to be a hint that i have lost my internet! booo :( oh well i'm very resourceful i can always getter done!

Signed, MissMeeka